Sunday, 4 April 2010

I am Sorry

I am truly sorry for a lot of reasons, firstly please don't worry we are all OK.

But also just a little word of warning, a blog is never truly anonymous and there are consequences of writing words sometimes.  They seem so innocent, just characters on a keyboard, but my they hold some terrible and terrifying power when you add them all together.

I made a mistake this week, I shouldn't have posted my Writing Workshop post.  I have hurt people I love and that is something that I never ever had any intention of doing.  I shouldn't have aired my dirty washing in public and I will not again.  I wrote the piece as a way of outpouring the emotion I was feeling a the time and should have left it at that. 

My blog has always felt like my safe haven, somewhere to write down my feelings and emotions, but I never really believed that anyone could or would be hurt by it.  I never thought it might get back to people, if I had known that I would have self-censored myself, I wouldn't have hurt people intentionally and the fact that I have is almost to much to bear.

I have a relationship to try and mend, if that it at all possible and will be doing so over the coming weeks, months and possibly years.  I have betrayed the trust and understanding of the person I love the most, my husband and made it very difficult for him and his family, if not impossible.  

So I am truly sorry, I didn't think, I didn't comprehend the possible outcomes, without the shield of the blog I wouldn't have said the things I did.

I don't know what is going to happen moving forward, only time will tell. 


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